Always sayin

Who Would Want To Go Back?

2011-02-28T00:38:00.013-06:00

This post all begins with a text message I had received from my good, female, friend. The fact that I mention she is a she is subtly pertinent to my little anecdote, but mostly in the realm of, "A girl would say that," and nothing more. It was Valentine's Day, and I had received the message during work, where I can occasionally sit for intervals plastered to my phone as a means of respite from the doldrums that is a stable career. The message read,

Happy Valentine's Day :) hope you're not hating today. (...)

The entirety of the message is not important to this post, on that you will just have to trust me. I certainly was not hating it more than any other workday up until that message. I messaged her back in witty retort, trying to save some face,

I hope you're not hating today? What's that supposed to mean? -_- lol. Happy V-Day to you madam.

After which were a couple of IMs sent to be me explaining in unnecessary detail the very self-aware reasons why I may be hating the holiday. Last I checked, this past Valentine's Day basically was not any different than the ones before.

Which brings me to the topic at hand. Being with oneself.

How to Be Alone

I like that video. Not in a viral, "Dude, have you seen this video?!", kind of way, but I like it. There are some people out there who simply do not know how to be with themselves for prolonged periods of time. An unforeseen tribulation that plagues the people I talk to that have been stepping into "the real world" for the first time is loneliness. For some, this time in their life is their first taste of what it truly means to be one your own. Please note, that being alone is not the same as being lonely. Albeit, they are related, being alone can often make one feel lonely. However, being alone is not as dark of a cave as people make it out to be. One of my favorite quotes from that video goes,

Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it.

Some of the best experiences in my short life have occurred when I have considered myself flying solo. I have stories of some experiences I have not even shared simply due to incredulity and lack of witnesses; it would be a waste of my time trying to paint a picture when the serendipitous nature of it all is only applicable through my eyes being with myself. It is a double-edged sword, I will admit. The lifestyle is certainly not for everyone. Just because society might be wrong about the darkness of cave, does not take away the fact that it is still a cave.

Plato's Allegory of the Cave

While not completely one to one for the metaphor I am going with, it relates well enough; the video is interesting if you like to philosophize in your spare time. I am not here to say that being lonely is the new popular, nor am I trying to glamorize solitude. However, a little perspective can make all the difference. Do I know how to survive on my own? Certainly. Am I immune to the loneliness? Certainly not. Do I know how to be content by myself? Yes, but as we all know, humans are social creatures and having some people that, you think, know you as well as you know them can be rather fulfilling, at least from what I have experienced. Just as the video quotes Homer,

Better to be the poor servant of a poor master, and to endure anything, rather than think as they do, and take after their manner.

I Still Can Recall

2011-02-08T08:31:00.003-06:00

In elementary school I had this one friend, he was a bit of an oddball and a happy-go-lucky character, even for elementary school. At some point in time he stopped showing up to class. I heard he moved to Africa.

That's it.

I knew the guy for couple of years before I even reached double digit years of age, but I will always know him as that one guy who up and moved to Africa. For all I know he could be back in America, if he ever left, and fighting crime as a masked superhero. I don't know, but it did make me wonder. Why do I remember him?

It's not like we were the best of friends. I am not sure how you were raised, but as for me, I was raised in the 90's. A childhood chock full of the classic Disney fluff and Nickelodeon, you know, back when Nick taught you that it was swell just being a kid and that having friends is the best-ety best thing in the whole world. That said, just about everyone and anyone in elementary without cooties was my friend. Hell, even the cootie ridden kids knew me as a nice person. (I was a very mature 3rd grader. I developed a cootie vaccine very early on.) Why do I remember him?

If you think I am going to find out why by the end of the post let me save you some time and say that I have no idea. I have asked a couple of people about this phenomenon, and it seems that everyone has a couple of those memories of people they will just always remember for some reason or another. Good, bad, terribly obscure, there is always someone. It does not matter how long I have known them. There are people I worked with all of college or high school that, come a couple of years, I am probably not even going to recognize their face. There are people I have met at bars that, for all I know, will be the last thought I think of before I leave this mortal coil.

I wonder how I will be remembered, or if I even have that kind of impact on people. I hope I do. Good, bad, or terribly obscure, deep down I hope that my relationships with people affect them as much as they affect me. I love meeting new people, and being with people I have already met. Now, two years out of college and starting a career, I hold the friends I have have now closer to my heart than ever. A good lot of them are still in college or still schooling, and even though I can hope that we will all be together forever, realistically I know that we each live our own lives. We all have things we want and, for some, just need to do in life. Whether or not that includes myself, is not up to me. I had a joke with one of my friends named Larry, I met him through a mutual friend who was his roommate at the time, that when we would say farewell after meeting with each other that it will be the last time that I see him. I have not seen him since 2008. We are still friends, I think, I just have not physically seen him. I hope he is doing well.

(I can't think of a picture to post with this. I wrote it on a plane ride.)

I got a new smartphone!

2010-08-06T10:21:00.002-05:00

So I got this new smart phone, called the Samsung Captivate. It's an Android based phone, so that means I can download, and hopefully make, some cool apps. Just like this one which I'm using to mobile blog.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.4.9

I like it when people understand.

2010-05-28T14:31:00.002-05:00

I was a little bored at work. So I decided to IM my friend, which I normally do, only this time I changed it up a little bit.

(10:38:00 AM) johnny156: Well, if it isn't Mika.

(10:38:11 AM) Mika: why hello there

(10:45:43 AM) johnny156: I can't believe you have the guts to show your face around here again ...

(10:46:00 AM) johnny156: Not after what you did to my family.

(10:46:04 AM) Mika: i can't believe you have guts

(10:47:24 AM) johnny156: Me?! ME?! You're the one who ran away! When we needed you the most.

(10:48:38 AM) Mika: you... you would think that.

(10:48:42 AM) Mika: it's not like you can understand

(10:49:27 AM) johnny156: I understand loud and clear! You only care about yourself, and your money!

(10:49:54 AM) Mika: money?! is THAT what you think this is about?!

(10:50:49 AM) johnny156: Don't lie. He told me everything.

(10:51:09 AM) Mika: what?!

(10:51:11 AM) Mika: who did?!

(10:51:16 AM) Mika: who did this?!

(10:52:13 AM) johnny156: A certain someone ... I think you know him from the war.

(10:52:29 AM) Mika: *from the war*

(10:52:31 AM) Mika: *from the war*

(10:52:34 AM) Mika: *from the war*

(10:52:42 AM) Mika: *enter FLASHBACK sequence*

(10:52:58 AM) johnny156: *disembodied voice* NOOOOOO!!!!

(10:53:10 AM) Mika: OH MY....

(10:53:14 AM) Mika: H MY GOD!

(10:53:16 AM) johnny156: YOU HAVE TO TAKE COVER!

(10:53:23 AM) Mika: NO!

(10:53:27 AM) Mika: i can't leave you!

(10:53:33 AM) Mika: the captain said to STAY TOGETHER

(10:53:40 AM) Mika: LOOK OUT FOR YOUR COMRADES.

(10:53:48 AM) Mika: i can't leave you here w/ your blown up legs.

(10:53:51 AM) Mika: you'll die!

(10:54:20 AM) johnny156: Mika, I died when you chose him over me... NOW GO!

(10:54:30 AM) johnny156: RUN!

(10:54:45 AM) Mika: ... no.... NOOOOOOOOOOOO

(10:54:47 AM) Mika: *runs away*

(10:54:55 AM) Mika: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(10:55:01 AM) Mika: *exit flashback sequence*

(10:55:10 AM) Mika: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(10:56:15 AM) johnny156: Old man Two Stubs has plenty of stories to tell, doesn't he Mika?

(10:56:32 AM) Mika: noo... noo.. *shakes head*

(10:56:36 AM) Mika: i thought i could leave the past behind

(10:56:43 AM) Mika: i wanted to start a NEW LIFE

(10:56:45 AM) Mika: away from it all!

(10:57:11 AM) johnny156: Away ... alone ... how you like it.

(10:57:55 AM) Mika: yeah.. well.

(10:58:00 AM) Mika: you know what, john?

(10:58:04 AM) Mika: i'm not afraid to run anymore

(10:58:07 AM) Mika: i realized long ago

(10:58:11 AM) Mika: that sometimes, that's the best solution

(10:58:13 AM) Mika: and now..

(10:58:18 AM) Mika: i'm going to run again.

(10:58:24 AM) Mika: im meeting some guys at the park

(10:58:40 AM) Mika: we're going to pretend we were kids again

(10:58:52 AM) Mika: and remember happier times.

(10:59:08 AM) Mika: (this is all true btw. haha. i really am going to the park soon)

(10:59:33 AM) johnny156: What's done is done. Take your money and leave.

(11:00:31 AM) johnny156: The raiders are gone, my sister is gone. We'll make it on our own, without you.

(11:00:46 AM) Mika: i'm sorry.

(11:00:51 AM) Mika: i never meant for it to be this way.

(11:00:59 AM) Mika: *walk away into the sunset*

(11:01:42 AM) johnny156: *shimmering tear down my face*

(11:01:56 AM) johnny156: Get out of here, before it's too late...

(11:02:02 AM) Mika: FIN.

Supression.

2010-05-03T00:50:00.004-05:00

Back in high school people used to call me "Jolly John."

"Don't be angry."

"Don't be like that."

All my life I've been told never to be mad. All my life I've been told never to be angry. Straight to the point where I simply wasn't allowed. I have seen other people angry. At me, at others, at the world. Even at the slightest things that would peeve me, someone would always be there to tell me how I should be feeling. Oh, but don't be angry.

Why not?

A smiling face. The most dangerous people in the world are often not the ones with tattoos all over their body or hard serious grimaces where ever they go. It's the person with the smiling face that has the most opportunity to cause the most harm. I am not one of those people. I have grown a level head. (More about that on a later post maybe.)

What happens to it all? If you are not allowed to let it out, where does it go?

EDIT:
Relative.

Of "Name That Tunes-day"

2010-04-12T22:46:00.004-05:00

For those of you who don't know, I keep a Twitter. I have been commended a couple of times by my friends for my tweets, although I really do not update it for them, or anyone specific for that matter. This blog, and my Twitter, are for anyone who cares to look me, or my thoughts, up. (Actually I started re-updating this blog so that my family and friends can keep better tabs of me so that I don' t have to call anyone individually.) Something that has caught some people's attention on Tuesdays around 12:00 PM on my Twitter. A segment I like to call "Name That Tunes-day." It is fairly self-explanatory, I tweet a line to a song, someone guesses it, and we are all smarter usually within 30 minutes of my posting. The person who guesses the song and artist first is supposed to be the winner, but there's no real winner¹, just fun². Some people think I must know every line of all the songs I know. Let me just get some things straight.

I like music. I like music a lot. I am just not that into the know-everything-about-a-song side of things. Band, title of the song, who sang it, and other which-what is all pretty arbitrary to me. In fact, more often than naught, the more I learn about a song ... the less I enjoy it. That said.

I like to sing. I like to sing a lot. I am just not that into the know-every-word-from-a-song side of things. Intro, outro, chorus, and other word-what is all pretty arbitrary to me. In fact, more often that naught, the more I learn how to sing a song ... the less ... I mumble. That said.

That is me.

Why should words get in the way of me enjoying life? However, sometimes³ I have no idea what I am really singing; and knowing what exactly you are singing can be useful information. (Little kids singing to "Ice Cream Paint Job" come to mind.)

¹ Yes there is.
² Yeah, for the winner.
³ see often.

Of last.fm and Pandora

2010-03-10T01:44:00.006-06:00

Consider this.

Two boxes of Lucky Charms. Both of the boxes advertise being a part of a balanced breakfast, and being magically delicious. However, one of the boxes is open. Clearly this open box has seen it's fair share of hungry mouths. Why hasn't anyone opened the one? Maybe it's bad? So you open up the second box, reach in and eat a single piece, wary that it might actually be bad. Well ... the other one tastes like Lucky Charms too. What's the difference? So you get two bowls, and pour yourself two bowls of goodness. The pre-opened box on the left, and the other on the right. You look down and find this...

And that about sums up my last.fm experience.

Graph

2010-03-06T02:51:00.002-06:00

It's like a puzzle of a my head.

Wii90X: The Introduction

2009-09-20T21:56:00.003-05:00

Welcome to a new segment on my blog I hope to actually keep up with, Wii90X.

What is Wii90X?

First watch this informercial.

Yeah...it's not that. Not at all...at least not yet.

It's actually going to be more like this guy.

The Wii Fit Experiment - Workout Montage from WiiNintendo.net on Vimeo.

Basically Wii90X is going to chronicle my efforts of living a healthier lifestyle by actually having some daily physical activity centered around the, you guessed it, Wii Fit. Why am I doing this? Well, it is actually more of a personal experiment for myself with the following questions. Does Wii Fit actually work? What would happen if I actually did exercise often? Is 90 days enough time for a significant lifestyle change? Does Wii Fit actually work? I also have this Wii on loan from my brother, we have had this long going exchange of video game hardware for 4 years now, and now I have a Wii, so my only big monetary investment in this is currently only the Wii Fit.

The Plan.

P90X, from what I have learned, consists of an X-TREME workout for about an hour everyday. So my plan consist of clocking in an average hour of "Fit Credits" everyday. The way Wii Fit's exercises work is that they are split up into four sections; Yoga, which focuses on honing your sense of balance, Strength Training, supposedly it focuses on building your strength, Aerobics, this is where cardio exercise are separated into, and Balance Games, that seem generally useless from a fitness standpoint. I will be spending all of my time posing with Yoga, lifting with Strength Training, and running in place with Aerobics. The balances games section, albeit more fun than say a torso twist, do not seem to be any sort of useful for the purpose of my experiment, so I will not be clocking in any time tightrope walking or ski jumping. My diet for the most part will remain unchanged, no strict dietary regimen here, although I will try my best to make healthier descisions about what will be passing through my lips. I will be updating this blog weekly, every Sunday is the plan, which will help me be accountable throughout this experiment. In the entries I hope too give status updates about how I am feeling at time, what kind of exercise I have been doing and overall progress about the whole thing.

The Goal.

The guy in the second video from WiiNintendo.net wrote that he lost 15 pounds in 41 days from adding Wii Fit to his daily routine. He did not change his dietary habit either. He simply did a whole-hearted Wii Fit workout for 30mins to an hour EVERYDAY. Wii Fit has the feature to set a weight goal on your profile. My goal is set to lose 20 pounds within 3 months. If I am able to pull this off I will be at a weight I have not been at since middle school, I am currently 22.

The Entry.

Now that you know what this is all going to be about I might as well start with my first post. I started this last Monday, September 14, I weighed in at 219.8 lbs. with a Body Mass Index of 31.47. I registered my profile at 5' 10" so with all of this together Wii Fit categorizes me into the "Obese" demographic. Wii Fit initially does not come with every single exercise unlocked, in fact I am still unlocking some of the strength exercises, so when I first started on Monday I only clocked in 30 minutes of "Fit Credits," the actual workout gameplay time, without over lapping or repeating any of the exercises. However, as time has passed I am now reaching a point where if I do a whole "lap" of all the exercises included in the game the Fit credits easily excede an hour. I must admit at first, I did not feel a thing. I mean, sure I broke a sweat, but the first few days just left me feeling tired, but not worked out. With more of the exercises unlocked now, that is becoming a rarer case. Have I seen any physical changes after a week? Well, sort of. The strength training exercises seem more geared toward toning muscles than building muscles. So personally, I have noticed my arm is slightly bigger, I have been able to increase reps of certain exercises I used to have trouble with, and after a week where my arm muscles used to be sore now my thigh muscles feel a bigger burn. Unfortunately, Wii Fit currenly has me at 221.8 lbs but I'm doing my best to not be discouraged. This seems like a pretty long post to read, so I will stop here. Until next week.

Mobile: It's Always Sunny in Austin

2009-09-16T23:15:00.000-05:00

Too bad I don't actually watch the show.

The annoyance list.

2009-09-11T23:46:00.010-05:00

Figure a.

I have decided to compile a list. If you have not yet guessed it, yes it will be of things that annoy me in a very special way. The kind of annoyances that make you facepalm. If you do not know what that means, please refer to Figure a (for further reading please see Figure b). This list will be in no particular order, and will hopefully be updated as time proceeds and I can recollect my thoughts.

People who don't use enough normal English. (Including slang, hype words, and cutesy words ending in -y, -ey, and/or -ly, also -ers or -erz)
Learning a truth you didn't want to hear.
Use of Internet slang/lingo/meme improperly in real life.
Ignorance, straight ignorance.
Tweets/updates about bodily functions ... Are you trying to dissuade skeptics of your humanity? Stop it.

Figure b.

Behold...err.

2009-09-10T04:55:00.001-05:00

Sounds about right.

There are people who don't know.

2009-08-31T11:55:00.001-05:00

Now you know.

Ode to Texas Weather

2009-08-27T09:59:00.004-05:00

This is not necessarily in order.

Especially during romantic comedies

2009-08-16T00:46:00.006-05:00

I always like a good story. Movie, book, video game, you name it. Usually with a good story, people like to add either a dash of fiction or throw the whole thing into a tale of whimsy. Having a sense of realism, I think, is key to telling a good story. However there are times where I will hear a voice in my head screaming "DOESN'T HAPPEN!" in certain scenarios.

Take this picture I found on the internet:

While I enjoy the humor of this picture...

DOESN'T HAPPEN!

The voice is like that of someone yelling at their incompetent employee, "YOU'RE FIRED!" and then stamping those words on their pink slip.*

I've come up with a nice visual aid, I hope to use again in some later post.

This does not mean I don't like some good fiction. Usually I will just play the "It's a movie." card, or something of the such, and just enjoy the ride, like when I watched just about every stunt in Die Hard 4.

I really just wanted to post this picture. It's pretty funny. I mean look at that guy's face. He just wants to play his game...stupid boobs getting in the way.

*I don't actually know how pink slips work. If I do ever get fired, I want it to happen exactly like that.

It's like someone recorded my geek dream.

2009-07-21T14:28:00.005-05:00

What happens when you combine my number one action anime with my number one game of all time?

The world probably would explode, or at least my head would.

While not being a cataclysmic threat, this video does get pretty close to my cephaclasm.

Mobile: Yes, That's a Spoon on Top

2009-07-20T12:28:00.001-05:00

Whether my weekend was productive or not is still a quandary...

Passion vs Preparation

2009-07-13T22:22:00.007-05:00

I'm going to steal a quote from this YouTube movie I watced recently, although the movie itself is not so recent. (More on that later.)

"If you know how you get somewhere, usually, you can figure out how to get out."

-Just a Nice Guy, Wong Fu Productions

Every now and then, as probably with most people, there are times where you try and take a step back from your life and figure out how exactly you got to where you are now. Maybe you are wondering why you have it so good, maybe you are wondering how did things go so wrong, or maybe you are wondering when did this all start or end. Maybe, just maybe, the thought has never crossed your mind.

Decisions. What did you do?

It is our decisions that govern how things unfold. Once you think about it, life could be seen as simply an object of infinite states. I say state meaning a state of being. If you are still confused, think of it life like a path beginning with being born and ending with dying, and there are infinite number of steps you can take to go from A to B. It is up to yourself to figure out exactly which steps exactly you are going to take. Which brings me to the topic at hand.

It's a fight between the heart and the brain!

There are two major factors that go into making your next move, passion and preparation. Yes, I know I can equate these words with other synonyms that would better convey my message, but for alliteration sake, I am using passion and preparation. These are hopefully self-explanatory, but I will expand for those who have not caught wind. I will start with the latter. Preparation involves your logic, your analysis, your sense of counter-balancing the good and the bad. Preparation is the part of you that can spot a good deal at a sale. Passion involves your emotion, and your...well, that is about it. It is that gut-feeling, your impulse. Passion is the part of you that buys that thing simply because it was on sale.

You can go right and wrong with how you choose to react. I find that the preparation side of life has the higher chance of "paying out," so to say. Why would it not? You have done your homework, the decision you are about to make works with your logic, and you have hopefully weighed it out to be the best choice. That being said, I also find that the jackpot can only be won with passion. It is like going all in, on pocket twos when you have not even seen the flop. For me, it seems like I can not even function with the passionate side of me anymore. Everything in my head seems to run through some filter of what is going to happen. I think it is because running on passion on my side of life, seems to only get me into trouble. Bad things sprout from relying on your gut too much. In the movie, "Minority Report," where most crime has been diminished, the only murders that occur are based on passion. I feel now more than ever, especially being out of college, that I have no room for mistakes. It feels like my safety net is gone. I have regret this. The mantra of "everything will be alright," seems to be fleeting. This subject matter has been on my mind for a while now, and even though the fall my hurt I feel like now maybe I should start rolling my dice.

Where does your fate lay? Why it is in your hands, of course. Now this is most certainly not a black and white affair. The shades of gray, can probably deduce your chances of failure while maximizing your pay out. Ferris Bueller's Day Off comes to mind. Of course, have a good amount of luck doesn't hurt. Just make sure it's the right kind of luck.

Cloud Computing, Before Your Eyes

2009-07-01T11:50:00.005-05:00

This video is proof of concept balls-to-the-wall amazing. So to give a brief premise this video is going to show you the power of cloud computing applied to normal applications we use everyday (i.e. video games)

I know, I know, you have a lot of questions. I am going to try my best to demystify some of the magic going on. You are probably asking, "John, what the heck is cloud computing?" My answer, "Well, it's basically parallel or distributed computing across multiple systems." And before you ask the next question about computing let me just give you an analogy.

Think about sometime ago when you were doing your homework. You had your math, science, and social studies homework to do, but you could only really work on each subject one at a time. So let's say you are a computer, and instead of math homework, you are doing computation. Doing math homework with one hand and social studies with you other hand, is sort of where we are today in computing in the world of multi-core processors and concurrent programming. What is an even easier way of getting homework done? A study group of course! A good study group, the one that just lets you copy down the answers and has the group do all of the work. That is cloud computing. You, the user, are having what is called "The Cloud," do all your work for you. Instead of the aforementioned study group, it is actually the Internet, which is nothing but a bunch of computers connected together doing the work.

I hoped that helped. With that in mind, a man by the name of Dave Perry decided to put words into action. He uses the power of cloud computing, a basic install of Firefox with Flash, and what has to be some sort of devil programming to hopefully open the world of video games, which tends to have and entrance fee and equipment prerequisite, to everybody by playing games like, "Spore" and "World of Warcraft" all within a Firefox window. Seeing is more believe so just watch the video.

Gaikai Technology Demo (JULY 1, 2009) from David Perry on Vimeo.

FSA Senior Will

2009-06-28T15:41:00.005-05:00

Back in high school we had senior wills. They were anonymous vindictive compilations of aversion and malediction typed and passed around the halls from person to person. If you're still having trouble understanding what I'm talking about, I believe someone has related it to a "Burn Book" ala the movie "Mean Girls." (Which I have never, nor do I plan to ever, seen in its entirety.) It was written like a will with excerpts like, "To ______, we leave you zip tie. Hopefully that will actually keep your legs closed." However, the senior will I wrote for my college organization is nothing like the such. It is meant to be commemorative and touching, and I wrote it with the intention to make at least one person cry. I am posting this now because I was cleaning my computer desktop and decided to post, so if you missed it the first time around, here you go.

First for the Fuglies. Blame me, Leslie, and Amanda, if that name sticks. Stay close, you all are a fugly family now, and do not be afraid to let latecomers join. You will learn as much from FSA as course at UT. Fatima, I will always remember your infectious laugh and smile, and your overwhelming trust and love for you friends, take care. Mika, all work and no play. Make sure your study breaks always involve FSA, they can help you with your school too. David, my adopted ading, time to man up, learn to take a shot, no more drinks from me huh? Genny, my SoAding, you’re a sweet gal don’t let anyone tell you different. Dean, my baklading, my favorite part about you is your indomitable spirit. Aim high, meet people, and you will definitely go places.

Secondly the Squeefers. Your class is an example of how an FSA family works, nauseatingly close-knit, but still welcoming, with just the right amount of under-your-breath shit talk. I fully believe you guys have what it takes to bring FSA back to its former glory. Czarina, me and Joy are leaving. It’s up to you, Queeny, to make sure there is a least one CC to take your place when you leave. Janel, the past three FCNs were produced by people equally busy with non-FSA stuff, as you will. Remember, you have other people to help you all the time; I hope to taste some sugar bread at FCN next year. Daniel, you certainly know how to influence and inspire people. Only use your powers for good, use it to get people active in your community work. Brenda, I hope your care and help you give everyone never runs out, you were and still are an amazing officer. Anna, where are you? Ah there! You are nice, truthful, and blunt. Deadly mix, but makes for a good friend. Glenn, you know my PSN. Rochelle, my brickhouse co-Ate, please smack our adings if they are doing something stupid…literally….any of them. Leslie, you are someone with whom I can always converse. Please keep in touch, and come back to Texas. Anne, you have good intentions and high ambitions. What happened on that kayak, stayed on that kayak. Open up your options sometime, you might be in for a pleasant surprise. Lastly, my first (good) ading, my successor in oddly too many ways, Dino. You are going to hate me in about a year or next semester. I always got your back. Do better than me. In all aspects, take that sentence to heart. Over the time I met you, you truly are my brother.

Will the Squirters please stand up? One, two, three, aaaaand four. Alright, that’s four more than expected. Thea, shut up. In all seriousness, you crack me up. Emily, you have changed a lot since freshman year, good luck with everything you do. Randy, please stay active. You may, quite factually, be the only 4th year in the org next year. In life, experience means a lot, the officers and members will need your input next year. Raisa…I said stand up. Oh you are standing. You were probably my first close friend in FSA. So for me, count that, I had a whole year in FSA without a friend like you. I am glad you joined. I will make sure to visit you in Houston sometime when we are both done with college.

The Floaters. Looking at the newbies, we are the last of our breed. It’s looking like shot trains, Duval, proper freshman motivation, all leave when we leave. I do not really identify myself as a “Floater,” but you guys are my class and we been in here for four years together. Anh, told me to mention him in my will. Darrell, also wants to be in my will, thanks for being the best roommate of all my four years of college. Maria, my first (good) co-Ate, you know. You know how it is, optimisic but down to Earth, and always on my ass if am remotely offending. Joy, that’s it, game over, see you at Christmas. I remember our freshman year, and traveling forth between cities. I am glad to have been part of your life for this long. Oh, and thanks for bringing me to FSA.

The last group, the people I do identify with, has no name. Even though we are not Floaters, Squirters, Squeefers, or Fuglies, the love for this organization runs deep. Cef Heruela, keep it real. Open your mouth more, because I know you know what you are talking about. Lance Heruela, “How are you doing?” I met you freshman year, and despite everything thrown at you, you always keep seeking your aspirations, I admire that about you. Keep fighting the good fight. Panda, you will be in Houston soon, please do not expect me to drive two hours to jumpstart your car, but do not ever hesitate to call if you need help. We grew a lot closer this past year and I appreciated your company and advice, heh. Gel, always smile and sing often. Being a first year upperclassmen, I tried to make sure you felt welcome when I met you, and now you are an officer. With your kindness, commitment, and sweet voice, I know you are going to make an awesome nurse. JoieL, what in the world did I drag you into. You are the president now, not bad considering a year ago you knew only a handful of people in the group. I wish I had met all of you four years ago. Until meeting you guys, I could not wait to leave college. Starting a career, traveling, earning real money, not studying; all of that could wait if it meant I could hang out with you guys at least one last time.

I finally understand. I finally understand why, when I was a freshman, the upperclassmen appreciated the alumni so much. Come your senior year, maybe you will too. This night ends in a couple more hours, what will you take from it? What can you take from it? The food will spoil. Our clothes will go out of style. That group picture of your table might even get lost.
Memories. In the end, all we have is our memories. Memories of the happiness. Memories of drama. Memories of when, what, and why. Most of all, memories of all the friends. Most of you have those titos and ninangs that are not really related to you, but friends of your parents. The friends you make today, just may be the titas and ninangs of your children. Cherish every moment with your friends. Soon enough the people beside you will just be memories, and memories are everlong. When you care about your friends, you will do anything just to see them smile. Everybody, thank you.

Week Links: The Requiem

2009-06-26T19:15:00.005-05:00

That's right. This will be my final Week Links. If you haven't been keeping up, I've been doing a Week Links about every two months. So I have decided to change my link dump model. This does not mean I will stop sharing the interesting and fun things on the internet. No, no, no. I do not go so quietly into the night. I think the new model will make this blog look more active.

A new PC is cheaper than a new Mac and, if you're doing it right, comes with all these bells and whistles that Maximum PC finds essential.

Since I don't have the expendable income to buy a fancy camera, I guess I will have to settle for a crap camera and these professional Photoshop effects.

If you have visited my blog before, most likely you are wasting time. Waste your time better off of my blog with ~~a timewaster~~ this musical toy. Just start clicking and dragging.

Here's a funny picture I StumbledUpon of great philosophers.

From personal experience, I can say that this pie chart works to some degree. From thedoghousediaries.com
I don't know where this originally came from but, according to this chart, I am somewhere between "Friend" and "Dating Zone," you do the math. LOL Null Set.Not to worry, XKCD always has some reaffirmation. I just like that last quote at the end.

I'm just glad I'm not like this guy from an article on TheOnion.com.

And now for the YouTube segment. Don't worry there's only 4 amazing clips.

This song has started my day for the past 2 weeks. It's upbeat, catchy, comes with it's own dance, and has a cute Japanese girl singing straight into the camera the whole time. What's not to like?

Here is the secret to Manny Pacquiao's success in the ring. Don't be afraid to laugh.

Don't like Asians? Neither does this guy.

My friend John showed me this video. It's the literal version of the "Total Eclipse of the Heart" video by Bonnie Tyler. Hilarity ensues.

I hope you have engorged yourself on Internet crud from my last Week Links. I tried to cram as much in here as possible. Be sure to check out my blog more often, or follow me on Twitter, where things will hopefully start to pick up. Enjoy.

Mobile: Company Picnic Fun

2009-06-12T13:17:00.002-05:00

Fancy

Mobile: The Jones wedding

2009-05-30T20:05:00.001-05:00

The wedding cake was nice...

But the groom's cake is full of win.

Mobile: My work.

2009-05-29T10:06:00.000-05:00

Very serious stuff.

Mobile: The Challenge part 2

2009-05-25T18:49:00.001-05:00

Here we go again...

Moblie: 4 years coming.

2009-05-23T07:20:00.001-05:00

BS indeed

I can relate.

2009-05-14T02:50:00.002-05:00

So true.

2009-05-05T08:59:00.002-05:00

So wrong.

That guy

2009-04-18T05:05:00.004-05:00

Here is a list of adjectives I have come to regret:

Nice
Good
Great
Cool
Sweet
Cute
Smart

Mobile: Company message?

2009-04-16T13:29:00.001-05:00

Mobile: So my professor today...

2009-04-08T14:13:00.001-05:00

While reciting poetry. He then proceeded to pull a truck with his teeth.

Eloi, Eloi, Lama Sabachthani

2009-04-04T21:54:00.005-05:00

Ahem...

It seems like recently, the right thing is the wrong decision. It is a little hard to explain what I am feeling without just itemizing some events. How can I put this? Think about Mario, or Luigi, in the first Mario Bros. game. Mario, hard working guy with mad ups. What does a plumber know about saving damsels from fire breathing dinosaur turtles? Not much, but hell he's going to get it done. So the level starts, and after pitfalls, fireballs, brick walls, and close calls, he finally reaches last room of the castle to save...a toadstool, please try again. All the setup, none of the reward.

That is a good metaphor of what is going on in my head right now; except to be more precise when you get to the end of the castle the guy at the end would have to kick Mario in the nards every time it wasn't really the princess. My outlook on how life is treating me right now is that...you can try your best, it just makes the fall hurt harder. It is as if my fortune is asymptotically bounded before real success. If I try to go beyond that line, reset at the bottom! You know the "right thing" spiel? If you don't know the "right thing," think of an old mid 90's feel good movie. The right thing is what the good guy always does. Work hard, be yourself, be reponsible...feh!

I work hard to get those interviews, only to get shot down. Work hard at a good company I'm excited for, during a hiring freeze. When others won't step up, get kicked down by the same old stuff. I get to graduate on time, and leave new friends I wish I met and stuck with 4 years ago. Look out for others, to find no one else watchin your back. I act myself, only to feel alienated.

I'm done. I quit. I'm tired. I thought things were gonna be different. You win reality...again.

I was going to post lyrics from the very appropriate song "Everything Sucks" by Reel Big Fish that have been on my AIM profile forever. I shouldn't have to post it cause people check AIM profiles every 5 minutes still, amirite? Instead here are some more appropriate lyrics

Cause they say it's gonna happen again
Over and over the fun never ends
You'll go to see the doctor cause you haven't got time for the pain
And he'll say it's gonna happen again
Over and over till your living end
You can't give in to the pain that is on the rise
You'll die a little bit inside

Happened Again - The Littlest Man Band

Of course I'm not gonna leave on that sour note. I have been writing this post all weekend actually. Blogging goes well with brooding. I was really down, until I went to church. God knew what I was going through. He's like psychic or something. Today, Sunday, at mass the responsorial psalm were what I had been thinking for a while now. The priest's homily had one underlying message, the message of the psalm.

"The suffering, is not the end of the story."

Mobile: You put stuff in it.

2009-03-31T15:10:00.001-05:00

Falcon BOX!!!

Mobile: The Divide

2009-03-19T14:02:00.002-05:00

My friend and I now share a whiteboard at work. So we started a war. Guess which side is mine.

Responsibility and Labels

2009-03-17T21:17:00.003-05:00

Let's do a little exercise.

- Think about...hmm...five of your friends names. Just their names.
- Put them in some order. Any order, it doesn't matter. Well at least not for this exercise, ask a shrink. I'm sure the order you put them in actually means you have some repressed daddy issues or something.
- Now think of their appearance. Whole body. In order.
- Now think of some words describing each one of them.

Was any of them "responsible?"

Now think of yourself being thought of by someone else, in this exercise. I'll give you a second to understand what I just asked.

You good?

Ok.

Do you think "responsible," popped up above your head? Maybe, maybe not. I'll tell you one thing. I myself, don't ever want that above my head.

Four years can seem to just fly by when you segment it like the American school system does. It's spring break now, and I've been think a lot of my next steps in life. I've said this before.

Responsibility sucks.

Sure, maturing and "growing up" is how I got to the subject, but this post isn't going to be about those woes. No, no. Responsibility, my friends, is the double-edged sword that has cut me more times than the piece of paper of a 1st grader trying to make a snowflake.

Do I describe myself a responsible person? Most certainly not, but I like to get things done, and I care for the things that matter to me. Too many times have I sacrificed my personal good time just to take care of that which holds a place in my life.

No one ever really wants to be the responsible one. That being said, you can't fight what you are. Being the responsible one is like being the guy you want to bring along for your trip, just because he'll watch your stuff.

I want to be respected. Not labeled.

Have you ever seen that episode of Daria (Who here watched Daria? Anyone?) where someone dies at her school, and everyone goes to her for death therapy? That is what it is like being the responsible one. Everyone goes to you...for work. Everyone comes to you...to rely on. Everyone goes to you...hoping to bail 'em out. Nobody ever comes to you...for a good time. Nobody ever looks up your number...cause you bring the fun.

Labeling people in general is bad. Having a label on someone, is almost like confining your opinion. People get surprised, sometimes, about how people act or when learning certain things. I prefer to question first, how much do you know about a person? How much are you basing your thoughts about a person on knowledge, and how much are you simply inferring?

This post was supposed to be better, but I'm getting tired of writing. Now comes the time to leave you with something poignant.

Labels, good on a can, not on a man.

(I need to blog more, this sucked.)

Week Links: Non-Valentine's Edition

2009-02-15T22:06:00.002-06:00

It's that time of the week again.

These ones are coming at ya, and have nothing to do with love...I think.

First thing, eff planet earth.

If that was too many words for you, then this Wallace and Grommit clip has no really talking at all. In fact the sound effects have been" enhanced."

I bet you thought this was going to another all video Week Links. Well you're only 4/5s right.I like art and video games too. And hybrids of the two every time.

And for more video whoring. This music video is pretty awesome. The music all sorts of mellow.

Speaking of whoring. Ends up I was wrong, I do have one relationship video on here. It's from this website called videojug.com that just has all these video guides on random stuff from cooking to kissing.

If you know me at all. I'm probably your "friend." Whether or not I meant to be, it's a blessing and a curse. Mainly curse, cause I'm not one to take advantage of people. Anyways, here is their tips on getting of what they call Frienditis.

I'll maybe post later again this week. This weekend, I actually had some fun...at a club. WHAT?!

More on that later, and you know it's gonna be in my cryptic speak so no one is really gonna understand anything of what's going on.

Look for it.

Exit faux euphoria. Enter Slap-In-The-Face cynicism.

Mobile: My Workspace

2009-02-09T10:39:00.000-06:00

That's it.

Phone Dump...

2009-02-08T03:45:00.007-06:00

Ahh...that feels good. Been saving these for a while. Time to finally post the random crap that's was on my phone.

Wal-Mart. Last sentence. First Paragraph. The English language makes fools of us all.

I don't think I pull off hats very well. And if I bought that one, I would be a bit of a poser.

O's Cafe. Very domesticated squirrels, who love potatoes.

Dinner when I was at Redmond.

If that doesn't make you want to donate to children's diabetes research...Wendy's will just feed her more.

21st birthday. Overall, not a disappointment.

Metal Gear Solid 4 lau...OMG what is wrong with Lisa's head?!

This one is self-explanatory.

It was a truck completely full of chickens. Not the first one I've seen, but the first one I've photographed.

Well, it was 73...but I was thirsty.

Actual Size? A man can dream.

Ahh yes, the shuttle stop was good indeed.

2008: Year in Review (Freestyle)

2009-01-21T23:52:00.010-06:00

It is some 31 days into 2009, and now I begin my New Year's post. I originally wanted to vlog to commemorate this momentous occasion but technical difficulties have impeded on my original plans. Since I don't really know how this post is going to work entirely, I'll simply go chronologically and probably give you a summary at the end.

Recently, I have been taking my tries at freestyling. So in order to make this post a little more interesting for you and me. The year in review today comes in rhyme form. Maybe the beat will help me jog my memory.

'08, I'm done with your shit.

This is the beat that made the rhyme, so give it time, and follow line by line.

Uhh. Yeah. Mmhmm.

Said, January not so merry
On my head to much to carry.
New Year's started this blog
In my head tried to clear the fog.
Slow start, no juice
Day by day, I started to loose-en.
Memories of the past, you know
Stick to me, they hold so fast, you know.
Haunting dreams, they hit down to the core.
Every night I asked for more and more.

February's just part 2
Listen here, I got more to do.
Mind still messin, from time before
Startin' to lessen, but I'm just not sure
What to expect to from the coming days-and I
Felt like I was in a haze.-But ya
Ya'll know me, same OG.
Rolling with the punches, 'til month number 3.

March, 3rd month of year
New number, same old fear.
Goodphil done come gone
If practiced more we could have won.
'member now, that month really sucked
Did my best but out I lucked.

4th month here gotta keep goin,
Hope these rhyme don't stop flowin.
Ha-Ha. Whoo-wee.
Ooh boy, it was clear to see.
That-my, theo-ry.
Was proven to me, from A to Z.
Straightened up, got out of the dirt
And continued my quest to find work.
But, to no avail,
Facepalm, boy did I fail.

End of the 'mester starts in May
Startin to 'member what I can say.
School was really kickin my ass
Strugglin', just trying to trying to pass.
From my phone, figured how to send pics,
To my blog, they're all up really quick.
Saw the last of old peeps graduate,
So happy, May '09 I can't wait.

But that wasn't coming soon,
So I had to say hello to June.
Summer started really slow,
ACC summer school sure blows.
PS3 keepin company,
Game came out called MSG.
Wait, no it was MGS-4.
I'd pop it in and I'd be less-bored.

July, owns my birthday
21, been coming long ways.
Day came, feelin little lonely,
Until I hooked up with my homies.
Tru-dy's, 6th-street
Drink specials you just couldn't beat.
Yo dog, I remember it all.
Any shots, I would call.
Official swerve, was finally here,
I think the first one was a beer.

August caused too much fuss.
Moved out was all of us.
I stayed with my friends,
Couldn't wait for it to end.
The fussin and fightin,
And cussin and cryin.
Living with these people I was dyin.
But it all ended pretty hip,
with Lifesize's internship.

Said, Do you remember
the 21st of September?
Ha. Ok, that's a song.
But how could I go wrong.
School was back in session,
And I have a confession.
When I first met her, she was off the chain,
Still can't get her out of my brain.

October, Halloween
Passed out at the worst scene.
Costume was a TV
Connected to a Ninty.
Don't believe? Just check Facebook,
There's a good one of me, you gotta look.
There's another of me passed out,
Worst timing made me wanna shout.

Almost done, I'm at Novemeber
Microsoft; could have been a contender.
Oh well, didn't go as planned
Maybe they were looking for a little less tanned.
My classes were hard to keep up
Coding everyday, I had enough.
Good grades, I had the key
'Til my prof kicked me down to a B.

December finally over
Some months and I still haven't told her.
The work was nice, it kept me ballin'
And wassup, my grades weren't fallin.

This whole thing was very Will Smith
Clean and simple, is easy to rhyme with.
I should end it with something deep,
But all that comes to mind is really cheap.
Year in review is what I came do,
Oh yeah, did I mention I chilled with So Real Cru?

Okay. Okay. Fuck that shit.
This is really gonna be it.
The flow is no mo' and before I go,
I wanna leave you on this note.
Accept the good, and roll with the bad.
Cause what you get or make is all you'll ever have.

PEACE!

Week Links: To hold you over.

2009-01-18T15:33:00.006-06:00

I really am planning a nice year in review blog post. In the meanwhile, my links buffer is ready to be dumped so here we go again!

This makes me wish I took a cooler English course than the one at Austin Community College. I stole that link from my former roommate's blog.

And I'm taking this next one from my friend in the Dallas area.

Just replace lawyer, with programmer.

Here are some old school Guess Who? hax. I used to love at damn game. Never gets old.

I recently bought Street Fighter 2 Turbo HD Remix for PSN (Johnny1156, look me up), and my twitter led me to some phat SF2 beatz.

Did you know the Philippines has recently made their first fully digitally animated film. It's called Dayo. I need some fansubbers on this ASAP.

Lasty, I'll leave you with some XKCD.

Heh, all too real.

Mobile: Closeout prices

2009-01-11T15:30:00.001-06:00

Amazing deal at big lots!

Year Links

2008-12-31T12:25:00.002-06:00

Hmm my 1 year blog-a-vesary is coming up. Maybe I'll post a retrospective of 2008 some time. Seems proper. For now I have some over due links for you all. All you random international people who come to my website. I hope to go visit all of your countries some day. And on to the links.

If you're feeling down, watch this guy...and feel even more down that you don't have one of your own.

If that wasn't enough. DUCK!

After 3 semesters of Japanese at UT. I can actually understand this pretty fluently. Albeit it's probably written by American people.

You say you like techno? You say you like Anime? You say you don't know what is an AMV? Well Wikipedia it I'm not gonna explain. But I will (Epilepsy Warning) exemplify. Does AMV even have a Wiki? ...hrm oh well.

All that video watching make you thirsty? Well, too bad. It's not your decision whether or not this purple something is gonna go down your throat.

lol.

Week Links: Sambakza version.

2008-12-20T13:26:00.003-06:00

I can't stress this enough. If you're reading this post.

WATCH THESE ANIMATIONS

Sambakza is a team of flash animators (I believe they also do web-comics), based in Korea, that to me are some of the best story tellers and animators using Flash in the world. They are Korean, so these music video are going to have Korean music but the message is there no matter what language you speak. It is a 5 part story, and gets better with every iteration. Just click "Watch this Movie" on all of the links.

There she is!!!

There she is!! Step 2

There she is!! Step 3

There she is!! Step 4

There she is!! Final Step

SO GOOOOD!

Mobile: Makes no difference where

2008-12-20T00:32:00.002-06:00

As per usual. No real surprises here. Country and anonymity still not enough.

Found something out last night.

2008-12-14T22:52:00.005-06:00

Two summers ago, I was that red guy to one of my friends.

If someone knows if this is a web-comic...

2008-12-14T18:00:00.006-06:00

Please tell me where I can read more.

His face is priceless in that last frame.

Social Paradox

2008-12-09T03:18:00.005-06:00

I think I spend enough of my time thinking about myself. Not that kind of thinking about myself, the philosophical thinking about myself and why I do things. Tonight, is going to be me analyzing my social habits and skills. I, myself, try my best to individual amongst everybody else. Not so much to stand out and bring attention to myself, but to think differently from everyone else. One of the ways I do that is simply straight apathy. If you see me on the street, I do not care about you. Or at least what you think about me.

Anonymity, can be very powerful.

Many times have I convinced people, who I have never met before ever, to tell me what is bugging them, and I proceed to hand out my advice on the situation. Why? Why bother? Why would they do that? Why not? I mean, I don't care really what you think, and I would be a perfect objective stance to whatever they would be facing. Odds are, if this is the first time I have met you, this just might also be the last time I am going to see you. This can easily split into a, "Don't waste your time with hate," speech but maybe some other time. My point is that, when you stop caring about what others think sometime you can do whatever you want. I pull of lot of strength and confidence when I meet you people from my anonymity.

Thus, poses the paradox. If you talk to my friends and ask about me, I'm pretty sure you would get a generic description of my attitude. Easy going, likable, wears flip-flops all the time, and then probably some odd men out. This is because when I am with people I consider my friends, that fog of anonymity begins to really clear up and I feel like I must act a certain way because that is how they have come to know me. Either a really nice guy or a sarcastic jerk. An outgoing schmoozer, or a background prop. I always love meeting new people, but it's the lasting relationships that confine me to act like something other than myself.

This is extra hard when trying to form those deeper kinds of relationships. The kind in your family, or with "best friends," or your special others. The first two come easier, unless you have been living a lie your whole life, because those usually have a pretense of knowing you from an early start and after long periods of time the ruse of ambiguity just fades away. That last case is what is compelling me to write about my social mind. To sum up the paradox.

Paradox: Not knowing people lets me be very approachable, to the people whom I want to grow close. Growing close means caring about their judgment, so I keep myself away even though I want to form those bonds.

*Aside* I find that, I really don't care about anyone's opinion ever. Except when I am interested in someone, then that is the only opinion I ever care about, and the human interactive framework in me crumbles down to the bumbling guy I was in middle school. I wish I had to courage to finally really say something to her.

Week Links: Outdated version

2008-11-29T08:17:00.003-06:00

This week seemed to go on forever...

Alica Keys is still hot.

I'm still a geek and still like anime.

If I haven't shown this to you yet, you need a punch in the face.

It's the small things in life that make you feel like the world is a good place.

This last one, just watch it it's great.

Well, it's nothing I'm not used to.

2008-11-22T23:56:00.005-06:00

As per usual. (As usual as this blog can get.) I'll start with a comment about this blog itself.

It's becoming a vent.

That aside. I made sure to leave my self some messages this time to make sure I remember what to write about. If there is anything ever on here you do not understand or think it comes off a little weird. There's most likely a double meaning behind it, and is probably not too hard to figure out what I'm talking about if you just think about it for a while. It would also help to know me better.

And that aside. I forget if I have written about this, but I'm stuck in a loop. Time, linear. History...wait...this all sounds definitely familiar. Familiar, yes, but different I'm still typing. Even my posts are looping. I just can not seem to escape. If you have seen my Facebook in the past week, I have been trying to play the optimist. I think back to before high school, and I noticed that went I walk around now I am never looking up. My head is always to the ground. 4 years I have been at this university, and just keeping my head up changes the look entirely. That said, just because it looks different does mean shit. Like I said I'm in a loop. So guess what happened, if you said, "that same thing as last time," you would pretty much be right. Starts with a good, "Things will be different! It'll all be good and fun this time! Everyone else always has a blast."

Why not? Can I? Be like them?

Of course them is not always good. That's me at least trying to be a little positive. I tried, I mean I really tried, and thought it was going good for a while. Then when one thing goes wrong, I go and make an excuse. An excuse about being not like them, and that's how I like it. Of course an excuse can always be excused, if the excuse is true. (Trying the optimism again.) I've been trying to achieve some goals this year, and often I think of something that is beyond my control that has stopped me from doing so. So now, when it simply comes down to the fact that I tried, and failed, it comes to me as a surprise and disappointment. Desperately looking for reason for the outcome, it is simply the case that I am just not used to rolling snake eyes on fair dice. We've all got in our head what we hope for, dream about, fantasize.

Is this all just fantasy?

Responsibility sucks.

I'm coming back...

2008-10-21T10:41:00.001-05:00

Expect it.

Vlogs and stuff...

EEE PC review.

Maybe some video game reviews...

But right now,

Japanese class stabbing me in the back.

Chemistry lab is twisting the knife.

And my CS classes are kicking me while I'm down.

Graduation May '09 in the making.

A good day.

2008-05-31T20:30:00.002-05:00

Welcome baby John (henry)

Mobile: God Willing

2008-05-17T23:02:00.003-05:00

One more year. Congratulations '08!

Mobile: La Madeleine

2008-05-16T17:55:00.003-05:00

Fresh fruit tart.

Mobile: Ice Ice Baby

2008-05-15T16:28:00.003-05:00

Hailed last night. I live across the street from this.

I have a final in 11 hours.

2008-05-13T02:50:00.005-05:00

But this trailer is way too good to pass up.

Oh man. June 12. Courage is Solid.

EDIT: This trailer is so good, my blog can't even contain it!

Mobile: My finals situation

2008-05-08T19:27:00.003-05:00

That fish is gonna devour me.

Mobile: God is real.

2008-05-08T16:54:00.003-05:00

QED

Week Links: Pre-Finals edition.

2008-05-08T02:30:00.004-05:00

No this wasn't the good cop-out I was talking about before. Unfortunately, my link list is not accumulating as much as I thought it would be doing. I am just going with what I got. It's the beginning of finals week for me so...that's a week to post.

Ever play that game Paperboy? Have you ever wanted to play Paperboy with the real Paperboy?

Baby + Asian + The Beatles = this.

Watch this flash movie, and feel artsy and better for it. It one of those movies that made me feel those...things...that the brain sends, but we say it come from the heart....Emotion! That's the word.

If you thought the Facebook typing application was addicting. This one is actually fun.

If you haven't noticed yet, my blog posts are aimed to my hobbies, likes, and dislikes. If you haven't noticed that those have been following a trend, then stop stalking me and read someone else's blog. Otherwise, try and categorize me and/or yourself.

My blog is getting more and more structured, and I found out how to mobile blog. (Which as it ends up is 100x smaller blogging, but at least 10x more fun doing it.) This place is looking up.

Mobile blogging test GO!

2008-05-06T12:46:00.003-05:00

Mobile blogging test GO!

I'm blogging.

2008-04-28T01:53:00.009-05:00

What's that?

Because I can, shut up.

I know nobody really reads this thing, but it is nice to have delusions of...uhh...camaraderie. But as a warning to anyone who might be reading this, this post is going to be an update/introspective post, so no opinion talking here. Just what's going on in my life, and annoying thought questions...maybe. And I'll get around to posting those anime reviews sometime.

I feel like my posts have been lacking pictures.

Hey look it's Megaman! He saves the day, even when it doesn't involve Mavericks or Robot Masters. Thanks Megaman!

Anyways, let's see. My sister has recently had a door of opportunity open up for her. Hooray! I am very proud, I'm glad at least someone in my family has had somethings going for them. I, on the other hand, have had a door close in San Antonio. But you know what they say, "BLAH -BLAH-BLAH closes BLAH-BLAH-BLAH others open." I really want this Paypal opportunity to work or for Samsung to at least contact me back. I might be holed up somewhere for the next couple of weeks until finals go by. If you do not see me for a while, try my cellular phone.
Oh, I mentioned in a post before, some time before, that I felt that something was missing. I said that I did not think is what that. As is ends up is was partially God. To which I slightly resolved my predicament, thank you CFC Youth Campus Based, hopefully I won't end up disliking this group like I do with most Youth groups/programs/meetings.

Ah-hah! I finally remembered what introspective I wanted to post about.

Friendship. Always a good thing right?...Huh?

When did it get late.

Now I'm tired, oh well. I you really wanted to know that introspective part. Uhh...it was along the lines of...uhh...people I meet....and people I've known...hard to connect. Yeah, good night!

Drawing a blank.

2008-04-21T04:06:00.003-05:00

It's almost the end of April, and I'm finally posting again. I made this thing to help me with my writing or something of that sort. Instead, I am using it simply to kill some time. Well...currently I'm using it because I don't feel like sleeping. But I ponder.

Why aren't I posting more?

I mean I have opinions about things. I go through enough conflict and events in my life to record them. Why aren't I posting more?

I figured it out today. In case you don't know, I spend a lot of time in my own head. WAAAYYYY too much time in there. When I am not talking to somebody, most likely, I will be talking to myself. I have easily received some weird looks and hard to answer questions from mumbling or smiling to myself. If you have never talked to yourself before, I mean truly out loud talked to yourself before, then you should take sometime to start simply asking yourself some questions. Don't forget to also respond to them out loud. It is a nice exercise of self-enlightenment. Although, it comes at a disadvantage (at least for me), I usually talk to myself at a bias against myself.

Anyways, I am getting off topic.

Why aren't I posting more? Answer, I do all of my blogging mentally. People use their blogs mainly to feed the need to express themselves or at the very least their opinion on something. All of those opinions and creative thoughts that would go into a blog post, simply end up as thoughts in my head that end in "...I should post that." and also end in "...don't forget, you suck." Here is to attempt number two, may I post more and spend much less time talking to myself and more time talking to a blog.

(If you ever see me, most likely with my head down or up, moving my arms about. I'm probably hidden somewhere in my own mind. Just give a shake or yell my name, I'll most likely snap out of it.)

(Yes, I know I haven't done a Week Links in a while. And I know a perfect cop out to make upfor it suckers.)

Week Links 3: Commercial Edition

2008-04-07T22:45:00.003-05:00

I know it's Monday...night.

I don't care. So I'm a day or two late, I'm new.

This is gonna be stuff I wanna get.

Here's some hip-hop video game wear.

If I was hipster, I definitely get this Pikachu fitted hat. Some Neon Tetris kicks wouldn't be so bad while I'm at it.

Unfortunately.

John != Hip;

Why? That last statement is pretty much self explanatory. However, I don't own nearly enough witty T-shirts. Which is why I want the shirt with the love math.

This last thing is the one I'm most likely actually going to buy.

It's a fun card game called Munchkin. I'm debating which kind to get, I think Munchkin Fu is going to be the deck of choice.

Have a nice we...rest of the week.

I should write in a scholarly journal.

2008-04-02T13:38:00.004-05:00

The article will be titled,

"The Effect of Women's Relationship Status with Respect to Connections with John Muniz."

I'm 0-5 with my theory of women. Well, 5-0 depending on how you look at it. Hell. make it 6-0 just to make the numbers look higher. And if I want it to be more general of a case, 7-0. I'll call it Munizian Theory, actually...7-0...Muniz's Law of Relationship Equilibria.

The Muniz Effect.

I'm gonna be rich

I think I'm really gonna buy this shirt.

Month in Review.

2008-04-01T00:14:00.004-05:00

It's now 15 mintues into April. "Rabbit Rabbit" everyone. A lot of things...hmm, let's see...plenty of...no...

THINGS happened in March.

Let me know if I'm missing anything.

Umm...

Yeah...

Oh! Spring Break...
- I went home.
- Goodphil.

A wave of tests.

Let's see...

I'm still single...ladies?

March sucked on the whole. Nothing happened. Even Spring Break was a let down. At least the day I celebrate when my Lord and savior has risen, has come and past. Come to think of it, Easter was actually more fun than Spring Break this year...wow. In retrospect, something must have happened during Spring Break, because from the beginning of that week onward things just went bleh.

Oh, to quote Reel Big Fish, "I can't do that, so I'm givin' up again."

New month on the horizon, I'll try and blank slate it. Keep my mind and heart open, come what may. I will try to even blog some more, so as to not keep my 50 visitors in such suspense of what will happen to me next. I'm think of doing a review of Genshiken. I also just downloaded Lucky Star. (That was probably a mistake.)

Well here's to April. Don't screw up.

Week Links 2

2008-03-30T13:03:00.001-05:00

This week:

was going to suck...was sucking during...and in retrospect, sucked.

(My vocabulary has reduced to that of a 7th grader. At least I'm not calling everything gay.)

This has managed to hold my attention once every three days this week. I wonder how much rubbing alcohol that took.

I'm taking this one from a "cyberspace" class I'm taking. It's pictures! I suggest staring at them in a Starbucks, with your laptop screen facing the entrance or order line so people can get a nice view and will think you're upper crusty.

Two links for the week?

That's gay...

Ah shit.

I've always wanted to post stupid shit.

2008-03-26T23:30:00.001-05:00

I have a blog now...just try and stop me.

Which Disney Hero Are You?
	You are part Tarzan. You feel out of place when you venture away from your home and into the heart of the city. Your whole life you've been trying to fit in with the styles and trends, but now you're starting to realize that it's OK to enjoy simplicity. Watch out though! Someone your complete opposite is about to enter your life.
	You are part Simba. You're young, naive, and misguided. However, don't fear, because your growth comes exponentially with hard times ahead. Only then will you reach the goals you've set out to accomplish.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Week Links

2008-03-22T23:56:00.001-05:00

Haha...get it?

I've never had real mochi before...I want to try some now.

It's all about the slow-mo at the end.

Because the first 4 games were just so good.

Boxhead: Zombie Wars

Come join UT FSA...we can dance.

The good ol' times.

2008-03-13T03:09:00.002-05:00

When people in general weren't so complicated, and all you worried about was tomorrow.

When you weren't with someone...and they were...and they knew it.

When you just couldn't take hints, that those jokes weren't between you two.

When everyone was simply a jerk and they felt the need to complain about on their LiveJournals.

Fun with the silent e.

2008-03-09T13:15:00.001-05:00

Spiderman...

Spidermane...

I said I wouldn't

2008-03-01T03:51:00.001-06:00

I've lied.

To myself.

It's more along the lines of, "Who am I kidding?"

As a bit of a disclaimer, this is going to be a DEB post...I know, I said I wouldn't. Or at least I hoped.

My eye lids are getting heavy and I can't understand Japanese, so let me get to typing.

When was it? When was I simply incapable of "having fun." I remember days that I didn't regret. I remember times when I...I knew people. Happiness is but fleeting. (Wow, this is starting to suck.) I can't help it, if sometimes I like to be a bit upper crusty. It is who I am. I won't change that. I can't change that. Maybe that's why. (いんぼう。。。）Things just don't work out. The best laid plans of mice and men often go to shit. (Hey, isn't it "awry") "...to shit." Just sounds better, shut up. "Why aren't you ever up there?!" Because, I can't nearly numb my emotions enough by myself. "John, you didn't have to." But...I guess I just care too much. Damn, compassion. One of those traits that seems to stab you in the back every time. (Please excuse any typos that might be in this post...my eyes are closed.) あの女がいない。So my everything, I suppose was a failure. (Oaawwww....) There certainly was a lot of bubble bursting. And easily a lot of expectations met. I really need to stop running simulations in my head, none of them are ever true. EVER.

Hey, two europeans. Bonjour, or something. Hola perhaps. Guten tag to my blog. Hey, that rhymes.

Eww those burps don't taste very good.

Why did that happen.

Ok, I'm done.

Later, hopefully.

"How about....HELL NO!"

What did I come all the way out here for?
I'm just...a rock on the side of the road!

You're wrong!

I'm awake.

2008-02-21T01:45:00.003-06:00

And when I'm up awake late enough, I get to contemplating.

I get sad and reminiscent often.

It's definitely Lenten time.

2008-02-20T00:51:00.001-06:00

Haven't posted in while. Still don't know what to say...

No red meat.

No going to Kotaku.com or Facebook.

No non-diet soda.

No chocolate.

Some more personal...

I've spent half of the past week coding.

I've had three tests, back to back to back.

I. Am. Tired.

What may come.

2008-02-02T01:43:00.002-06:00

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."
-George Santayana

Wise words Mr. Santayana. How ever, I am compelled to disagree. I think he was close. I will make my own modification.

"Those who cannot remember the past, are only the only ones surprised when it happens again."
-John Vincent Muniz

I added the Vincent because my middle name is cool.

Time, straight line.

History, circular...most likely spheroid.

If you learn about the past and history or you remain ignorant, has nothing to do with the fact that that you are fated for it to happen again. Now of course I do not mean exact same course of action and events taking place, that's why I mentioned history is most likely spheroid. The trip from point A to point B may not be exactly the same, but when it comes down to it, it's all just a bunch of circles. Calculus teaches that.

Alot of things in my life, seem to just repeat. (Especially my classes, but that's a different kettle 'o fish.) For middle school onward, I seem to just be stuck in this loop. It's not necessarily bad. Just a little too predictable now. If I graphed all high and low points of it all, I would end up with this sine wave of...fortune, for lack of better words. (Boy, I'm sure not skimping out on the math terminology in this post.) Condemned has such a finite connotation to it, doesn't it? Condemned. I don't feel so much condemned, per se, as much as I feel screwed over. It like repeating history is just a way of nature, and I can only have it run its course. After a while, you just know what is going to happen, in a general sense. You accept the fortune coming your way and brace for the downfall. I am not quite sure what I want to say in the post here, I'm probably just really bored, I have just noticed so many parallelisms that occur in my life and think that it cannot be all simply attributed to coincidence.

SO, I have deduced it down to fate.

As soon I figure out how to change that, I'll finally be able to break; out of that loop.

(It's as if my blogging corresponds to some English paper I have to write, but I actually just like to start things with a quote. This is all really what just pops into my head.)

Dream Analysis

2008-01-24T03:52:00.002-06:00

Okay.

So ever since...probably about the beginning of last summer, before I would go to bed, I would say my prayers. Every night, along with all my well-wishing for those I love, I would pray for a dream. What can I say, I love to dream. (Not in the figurative or curing cancer sense, literal dreaming.) My real life lacks a certain "oomph" that I can get when I dream. While you're dreaming you can feel all of the emotions and experiences you've been missing in the land of waking.

But enough of that poetry mess.

My recent past dreams have been a little weird...to say the least. A quite entertaining one involves, my roommate Steven's relationship, and I suppose playing too much "Ninja Gaiden Sigma."

So in this one, I'm apparently the ninja in "Ninja Gaiden Sigma" who has just been able to pin down this really strong fiend, who happens to be Steven's girlfriend. I haven't spent that much time with her, so her face in my dream was a bit fuzzy. But it was definitely Steve's girl. How am I so sure? Because while I am pinning her down, I am yelling at my roommate, who has this really big sword in his hands, to finish her off! (Yeah...really weird.)

So Steve is there.

Sword raised.

Me yelling, "Come on Steven! You have to do it!"

Steven is objecting, "I can't!"

"You have to! It's not her anymore! Just another fiend!"

"I can't do it." My roommate dejectedly admits as the sword fall from his clutches. While the fiend escapes my grip and gets away.

That one was pretty out there but this is not why I am posting tonight at 4 A.M. My most recent dream is by far the biggest mindfuck that hit me ever. I mean, this last one was some really hardcore Freudian shit. (You can tell how serious, I am by my use of expletives.)

Just to warn you, my dreams get pretty disjoint jumping from scene to scene. I also know now, after thinking about it for a while, why most of this is happening. Ask me of a real explanation later.

OK. So for some reason I'm on this trip on a boat. I am in the cabin of the ship, so it's just like being in a room, but I definitely know I am on a boat. There are like 3 other people there but I can't tell who they are, besides some captain figure. They must not have been very important. Oh yeah, in this cabin is a bed I pretty much reside on during most of the dream. So eventually, (After some dream-time-lapse) we stop and the captain guy and the other people open the door and leave the cabin of the boat. I get up to see where we are, and as it ends up we are at this like dried up dock. "Yeah...uhh...ok," is what's going through my dream-self's head. (Insert disjointedness here.) So I decide to go back on this boat. I open the door to the boat, which now has been connected to this hallway for some reason. (I left through one door, but came in the boat through this hallway door.) And now there is my friend from Kansas at this desk angrily, but loudly, mumbling to himself, ("him" in this next quote is actually someone's name [for anonymity sake], that my friend from Kansas does not know AT ALL) "Damn him! Why did she go to him! It's all his fault!" and other stuff along those lines. Again I am thinking, "Yeah...uhh...ok." and go to the bed and fall asleep. After a while someone wakes me up with, get this, a kiss on the forehead. The sensation of her lips on my forehead, felt quite real. As is ends up, the one who woke me up was this girl I hung out with a lot of the time this past summer. "Hey. How you doin?" in this calming gentle voice she tells me. I can't ever quite piece a sentence together when I'm dreaming, but I realize, "Hey, why not take this time to actually kiss her now? I mean she kissed me first." So I try to lean for this small kiss, but here lips are just always like slightly moving away every time I lean in. Its not like she was pushing me away, it was more like a slight tilt of her head was JUUUUST enough for me to not reach.

Then after a little while, I woke up.

"GOD DAMNIT!! It was a dream!" Was screaming through my head. "WTF! What was all of that going on?!"

It's taken me a little bit, and I've self-analyzed what been going on. And boy, subconscious sure is hiding thing my awake mind has been wondering about for a while.

What to do.

2008-01-14T14:37:00.001-06:00

Class at 5:00-6:30 on Mondays and Wenesdays.

That's it.

I feel like a bum...

...Until Tuesday or Thursday rolls around.

Welcome to Sympathy.

2008-01-12T04:57:00.002-06:00

"Whenever I investigate a smell, I find that the answer is always bad. It's never: What is that?...Muffins!"

-Demetri Martin

I find that when ever you truly relate to an anime character the relation is always bad. It's never: I know how he feels...that Speed Racer. I recently watched an anime suggested to be by a friend called "N.H.K. にようこそ" or "Welcome to the N.H.K."

It's basically about this guy who is a complete good-for-nothing shut-in ,for lack of better description, who eventually seeks help to cure him of his, what the series calls, hikikomori ways.

I quite enjoyed it. The show follows only a real handful of characters, which is good, and builds exactly who they are. I'm beginning to think I like shows where you get to know the characters alot. Getting to know the characters, you can't help but relate to what they're going through...well, I can't. This show was obviously aimed at people, in America are called generic nerds, on the Internets are called weaboos, and in Japan are called the otaku. None of the characters are ever really "good" to relate to, I mean, I can rundown a nice annotation of the characters and you take your pick. First is Satou, I man so helplessly caught in a rut his only means of getting out of his current situation, is to find an entirely different rut to...rut around in. Next we have Yamazaki, he got a creative dream to make it big and be successful, except his own "original" views tend to segregate him from his peers not to mention, bad lady luck. There's also Kashiwa, Satou's upperclassmen, successful school and business is jaded by the real world and its nature, she's owns a myriad of drugs to help her feel just the way she wants. The list goes on. And to carry on the generic conflict, there's is a nice relationship love story behind the entire thing that keeps you wanting to know what is going to happen next.

"Oh man, story of my life." I keep telling myself as I watch the show with sympathetic snickers and sighs. I relate well to Satou and Yamazaki, but towards Yamazaki alot more...I mean he's trying to make a video to make it big, has that oh so lovely girl problem...hello? There's a couple of lines he says that will help feed that nice emo side of you like, "Romantic love is a trap designed to expand capitalism." But there was one line specifically, "Nothing happened to me! It's just that my theory from the past has been proven..."

Greatness...that's my character.

This anime is definitely going under personal favorites, although it is definitely not for just anyone to watch. There is a charming love story behind the whole thing but it's probably not as straightforward for non-otaku to keep the show going. If you're curious, just go to veoh.com and search for Welcome to the NHK, they've got them all. I had a rousing good time.

きえるせろ、おんあども！

Stream

2008-01-08T02:59:00.001-06:00

Hello.

Hi.

What's up.

Oh, not much. You?

Meh.

Meh? What's that supposed to mean.

Just meh.

Oh come on, something's bothering you.

You're right, but I say meh.

You're not telling me anything.

That's how I am, and for lack of better words and bad anime subbing...I'm perverse, so meh.

You're annoying sometimes, you know.

Yeah.

So what's really on your mind?

Alot, and you'd think I'd have this big fear of what's ahead, but I really just want to know what's missing from me right now.

Missing?

Yeah, ever since school started back in late August, things have been very empty in my life.

You know there's better guidance than me.

Yeah, I went there and I don't think I'm without that.

Sorry bud can't help you, but I know how your feel.

Oh gee, thanks alot.

Hey...shut up.

Always sayin

Who Would Want To Go Back?

I Still Can Recall

I got a new smartphone!

I like it when people understand.

Supression.

Of "Name That Tunes-day"

Of last.fm and Pandora

Graph

Wii90X: The Introduction

Mobile: It's Always Sunny in Austin

The annoyance list.

Behold...err.

There are people who don't know.

Ode to Texas Weather

Especially during romantic comedies

It's like someone recorded my geek dream.

Mobile: Yes, That's a Spoon on Top

Passion vs Preparation

Cloud Computing, Before Your Eyes

FSA Senior Will

Week Links: The Requiem

Mobile: Company Picnic Fun

Mobile: The Jones wedding

Mobile: My work.

Mobile: The Challenge part 2

Moblie: 4 years coming.

I can relate.

So true.

That guy

Mobile: Company message?

Mobile: So my professor today...

Eloi, Eloi, Lama Sabachthani

Mobile: You put stuff in it.

Mobile: The Divide

Responsibility and Labels

Week Links: Non-Valentine's Edition

Mobile: My Workspace

Phone Dump...

2008: Year in Review (Freestyle)

Week Links: To hold you over.

Mobile: Closeout prices

Year Links

Week Links: Sambakza version.

Mobile: Makes no difference where

Found something out last night.

If someone knows if this is a web-comic...

Social Paradox

Week Links: Outdated version

Well, it's nothing I'm not used to.

I'm coming back...

A good day.

Mobile: God Willing

Mobile: La Madeleine

Mobile: Ice Ice Baby

I have a final in 11 hours.

Mobile: My finals situation

Mobile: God is real.

Week Links: Pre-Finals edition.

Mobile blogging test GO!

I'm blogging.

Drawing a blank.

Week Links 3: Commercial Edition

I should write in a scholarly journal.

Month in Review.

Week Links 2

I've always wanted to post stupid shit.

Which Disney Hero Are You?

Week Links

The good ol' times.

Fun with the silent e.

I said I wouldn't

I'm awake.

It's definitely Lenten time.

What may come.

Dream Analysis

What to do.

Welcome to Sympathy.

Stream